2011 - 2014

WTF?! Whats with me and inconsistency?? Its been 4years since I visited this blog site.

Here's a rundown of that 4 years:

2011: KABOOMS!

I reached my highest weight by the end of this year, almost 100kgs!! :((( What happened?? lotsa lotsa letting go and fastfood and chocolates thats what.. and I didnt even notice the pounds had crept in

I went on a Europe tour by the end of the year with my bestfriend from Sydney, and much to say I loathed myself.. I was pudgy, weak, sickly and couldnt TOTALLY enjoy much of the trip. It was cold, we were walking a lot, and I was surrounded by these fit, young aussies and kiwis that I felt so old and well.. ugly.. Dont get me wrong I still enjoyed the sight seeing, the time with my bestie, and ofcourse the new places that I saw. Man oh man did I love Rome!! Venice and Florence.. out of all the 9 countries we went to, Italy was amazing! I just wished I was in top shape then..

2012: AWARENESS

I reunited with some old friends, started going out again and somehow lost 5kgs by March..

I joined the gym after 6 years of not going.. my starting weight -- 95kgs... I started slow..I mean really slow..on and off.. but still went to the gym.. It kicked in around August time when I am going regularly after work. During Ramadan, there were no classes held after work until late. So I did my own weights and cardio training. was ok..

In September, I started to really do this.. I am attending body pump an body combat on the same day.. I started going to the gym Sundays (2hrs), Tuesdays (2hrs), Thursday (1hr) and I LOVE IT!!! I can deplete myself until Im crawling out of the gym and would gladly do it the next day... I can say my fitness had started at this point.

I dont like weighing myself, so I didnt. I am more concerned of my clothes size. I think since march , I had gone down to size 18 to 16. ALL THIS WITHOUT THE DIET. Just full on working out. The only thing I cut out from my diet was the fried fast food.. and thats it.

I still ate whatever I want, whenever I want. I HOGGED chocolates.. (to date).

2013: SAME OL SHITE..

Working out regularly. My weights had gradually increased.. from a measely 2kgs per side of the barbells up to 7.5kgs on each side.. For Body Combat and Body Pump, I do give it my all until I can no longer breathe... :D I started to discover my increased capacity, increased stamina, and further I made workout buddies at the gym..

I had become a gym rat.. :) AND from:
- 95kgs I am down to 75kgs
- size 18 down to size 10 OR 12,
- BMI of 33 to 26
- Muscle Mass of 27kg -28.5kg
- Body fat % from 46.7 to 33

without proper diet, and I must say poor nutrition..

That is so wrong.. I know.. That is me being easy on myself,

I am lazy. Lazy to prepare my meals, lazy to cook, lazy to buy stuff to cook. So there. thats my biggest hurdle from the dawn of my female body awareness :/. Pa deliver dito, padeliver kay kuya, junk food, pagutuman hanggang sipagin mag luto ngggg.. noodles! :D hay.. this is my waterloo.. For the whole of 2013, I fluctuated between 73-78kgs.. At one point of the year, I started drinking a lot, bec of the people I hang out with. Its not really a problem for me, I do handle my alcohol very well.. Surprisingly, for someone who doesnt drink a lot, can handle a lot of beers in one go (10 beers max) and still walk properly, talk straight and even drive home.. Although my friends dont let me on most days.. So during this drinking phase, the scale didnt budge despite working out like a mad woman. There I realised, this has got to go..Im alcohol free until year end. well not really free, I drank on NYE but thats it.. as part of the celebration.

Oh btw, I fucking skydived this year! hell yeah! and I would do it again and again if given the budget :D

2014: Stuck at 75kg and Im sick of it...

I know I had to do something with my nutrition. Thats the only missing component. I did try before, SEVERAL times, to eat healthy, but failed miserably. The ratio of 20% exercising and 80% nutrition is the opposite, Im doing 90% exercising and 10% nutrition. I am now considered one of the regulars at the gym, a "hard core" workout-er (if there is such a term).. I lift, I box, I do interval trainings, circuit trainings, I do spinning sometimes.. I mean, I am actually there in the fitness side as to what my body will allow me.. But I am not at the ideal best, after more than 1 year at the gym.. I should be more than what I am right now. AND I shouldnt be spending so much time at the gym.. AND I should be at my leanest now given the way I workout..

BUT HELL NO. I am still with flabs, I still look big/fat, I still have a tummy. I do appreciate the success that I had. I am proud to say, I fit in most of my clothes circa 2006 :). My butt looks way better than in 2006 :D (aiming for that rock hard round bums, so can you imagine how many squats I do at the gym?!?!? It does not happen overnight people!!) . I can feel my arm muscles.. I love the fact that I can feel my tricep muscles when I twist and place my arms in front of me. I love the fact that I can do intervals on the treadmill of up to a speed of 12 (8.5 working to 12 speed at a 1:1 ratio of 30secs work, 30secs rest; ending the whole thing with a 15mins speedwalk at 7.5). I love the fact that I can workout and that I absolutely love it.

But this is not entirely what I want.

I want a strong, tight and lean body. I dont want to be skinny nor skinny fat, and I do not want to be bulky (bulky with fat) either. I never wanted to. I want to be Lean, Lean, Lean!!!!. Have those toned muscles, a body fat % of 22, a BMI of 20 :))). I want to beat the shit out of people during bootcamps, circuits, and mud races. I want to skydive without worrying if I will breach the weight limit. I want sexy shoulders. I want to walk from my core, and feel my core work in every movement like clockwork. I want to do Les Milles Grit, without dying. I wanna kill it! I want my body to work freely.

Ahh.. how good must that feel...

I want to be FIT. But with the way Im going, Im gonna kill myself by not realizing that goal.

One person had told me that I am over training in order to COMPENSATE for a BAD DIET. Ding! Spot on! Guilty as charged.. But honestly.. I workout like this not because I have to, but because I want to. I love the feeling of being able to lift more, to last more, to sweat more. I love the feeling of being strong and the fact that it wasnt really that difficult for me to reach this place. Physical activies are relatively easy for me (difficulty is / was proportionate to my body weight).

By the end of 2013 this is my routine:

Sun: 7-9 body pump + combat; 9-9:30- sauna; 10pm- home
Mon: sometimes off; some days- 45mins/5km interval training on the treadmill+1hr body balance; 30 mins at the sauna; home by 10
Tues: 7-9 body pump + combat; 9-9:30- sauna; 10pm- home
Wed: Rest
Thurs: rest OR  7-8 either body combat or 45mins on the treadmill; home by 9
Fri: 10-12 body pump + body step; 12-12:30- sauna; 1pm- home/out
Sat: Rest aka. chores day! :(

On top of this, I aim to reach 8000 to 10000 steps a day (using a wrist pedometer- wont brand drop here :P )  AND I try to squeeze in some social life at nights/in between.

Given this schedule, I reach home by 10 on most days. That leaves me with no energy for anything else. I either have a protein drink, followed by some junk (chips, biscuits, leftovers) when I reach home.. I also have a cat that I need to clean up for, groom and play a bit.. This is no issue as it barely takes 10mins to do the litter scooping, a bit of brushing and filling the food tray. Playing is 15mins (max for me.. Im so tired!)

Oh and I dont sleep well. I get barely 4hrs a day.. And that too is not a sound sleep.

There, its so obvious that it makes me look stupid

I know what I should do- balance it out. But it never worked for me before.
I should fix this 2 things:

- My nutrition-- to help me bring down my body fat
- Sleep-- get the recommended at least 6-7 hrs of sleep per day

How? Focus

Focus on these 2 things, like the way I focused on my workouts.

Focus..

Hocus.. Pocus..  :?? :D

I will create a new blog for this new task, journey, goal that I am embarking on that is PILL free! I want to be rid of these pills and do myself and my liver a  favor and finally start taking responsibility for my health.. I am not getting any younger.. :/

Bring on the Era of Nutrition..
 

Why am I blogging here again?

Umm I am hoping to be able to use my level 2 BPs that my friend who visited here for 1 month in his quest for a job bought for me (refer to my first blog of 2010). Its been with me since August but as luck would have it, it didnt come with the instructions. Grrr!

At the same time, I would like to keep track of my progress in trying to regain myself health wise (overall too..)

Also, its the only blog that I have made public. I have other 2,

- 1 just for my personal stuff

- and the other 1 for my thoughts brought about by my "tunganga" moments of (staring at nothing, killing time etc) at the bus stop, on the bus, in a group conversation where I dont like listening to anymore, daydreaming time, loooong meetings, while stuck in a traffic jam or whenever I have that "ding!!" moment lolz :))))

So there...

Fitness Age of an Old Lady

MY GAWD!!! tsk tsk tsk..

I went to the gym with bf yesterday around 8:45pm. Did my usual stretching, with aches still but a little less. I was kind of tired for the day but I decided to work out.

There are 2 treadmills and 1 ellipitical machines in our bldg gym, 1 was occupied when we came so I decided to use the elliptical since I have used it so many times before (before as in 6 yrs ago!! I was a member of an elite gym back at home and I loved using this machine, no pressure on my joints but works my thighs & bum better). I got on it and started at level 3 thinking "level 3? phew! I used to start at level 5 then".. stupid stupid stupid mistake. In short, by the time I reached 15 mins I was breathless and was having an asthma attack and a really bad one at that!

I still tried to slow down as I usually do on a work out even though I feel like I was in labour by the way I was breathing out so loudly and consecutively. I stopped and sat down and I really couldnt breath. Good thing is that the gym is 5 flrs away to my flat.. my bf was so concerned (of course! he better be!!) but I told him not to stop running

I walked towards the lift and I was ready to bang my head for the lift to open (I had this thing of banging my hands on something when I couldnt breath so I can forget the breathlessness feeling and feel the pain more in my hands, just to take away my attention to "IM NOT BREATHING!!"). For what it seemed like an hour the lift opened and thank God our flat is just 6-10 giant steps away. I can feel my face numb as I tried to open the door and immediately took my bag where my medicine was.. It took 20 minutes before I can breath normally. with my medicine, it usually takes not more than 5minutes for my breathing to normalize.

That was a bad attack. All my fault:
1) Should have started at level 1 to warm up, climb up to level 4 max and then back again
2) Should have taken my asthma meds before working out as I know Im not up to par yet.

This is what happens if you let go people!!! Dont take your health forgranted with BPs or none! Exercise and eat well!

Its so sad... I used to be so strong, I mean endurance wise. Now I feel like an old lady!!!

But Im working on it ;)

Two years later...

Gawd! So much has happened..

I re-read all my posts and I would like to kick myself!!! Who was that person?!?!? eating so healthy and exercising early in the morning?!??!?!?!?! Deym!

Let me give you a run down:

After Sept 2008, I moved to a 2 BR apartment with a friend. Started going out- clubbing, drinking and eating normally again, without the pills. I stopped working out at all! The only workout I get is when I climb the stairs to our flat (2 flights). Sometimes I do the 4 flights of stairs in the office but the habit wore off.. I started to eat more and more Indian food. My friend loves to cook and she makes us eat! Its delicious and I did not complain :) coz I dont know how to cook anyhow & Im not "allowed" to use her kitchen :)) I mentioned it because Indian food are rich foods and with all the spices and ghee used to cook 'em.. Oh boy.. By December 2008, I gained weight.. I can still fit into my size 8 clothes but mostly in my size 10.

When I went back home in December, I ordered for the level 2 of the Bangkok Pills. I took it for 1 month. I dont know if it was the change in weather and the pollution or the BPs but I find myself sick every morning for the days I took the level 2 BP, I felt groggy like when I have just taken my asthma meds. I guess it was both. But the results were Q-U-I-C-K!! I lost a few pounds.

Fast forward to March 2009. I told my friend about the BP and we ordered for 3 sets each of the level 1.. And the effect of the BPs on her was amazing! She really lost a lot! In my case, yes I lost a lot as well even without exercise (except for the stair climbing to the flat). After 3 months I stopped the BPs.

From then on, things went downhill I suppose. No exercise. No BPs. No healthy diet. the only exercise that I get somehow is when I place a parking ticket every hour and climb that 4 flights of stairs every hour to my office. This was good, I somehow maintained my flat tummy and kept my figure at a plateau I can accept.

2010. Im getting fatter and older. Each day. By March I moved out of the flat to a studio apartment. I was lazy. THe bldg I was staying at had a gym, pool and sauna which I did not use (STOOOPPIIIID!). I ate like nothing! I didnt care, I just ate. No exercise. Nothing!

Got myself into a lot of problems too. I was affected by the crisis. In the sense that my careless spending got back at me when the recession hit. So Im always stressed, looking for ways to make ends meet. I lost my drive, energy and desire to be fit and better. Im sad and sometimes I feel like Im depressed. Im frustrated at work most of the times too..

June 2010. My friend and I ordered the pills again 2 level 1 and 1 level 2 for each of us. Both were detected by fedex and we did not receive our package. Money lost.. :(((

To sum it up, Im size 14 touching 15, at least at 180lbs (?? I dont weigh myself but that's what I think, Im at my biggest EVER!!!!) sad most of the times, not exercising, not eating healthy, just... just getting by. Thanks to my bf who has always been there for me though. From the day we got together I was at my best in everything, and now I am at my worst at everything too.. He is still here with me, helping me out every step of the way. Though not that much financially as he earns less than I do, but he takes care of me during my weak moments. Agh! So much drama and financial troubles in my life right now.. 2010 sucked for me and still is as my dream car that I got last year just wouldnt start this Saturday only (maybe coz I havent sent the car for maintenance since it reached 5000kms and now its at 20000 kms huhuhu), unregistered, no insurance, and fines not paid!! Hayyy.. just remembered this:

Phobe Buffay: It should have been called, "It's a sucky life and just when you think it can't suck any more it does."

A friend of mine visited the country for 1 month (August) tryng to look for a job and I asked him to bring me 1 set of level 2 BP. Just 1 set, because first its expensive for him, second, dangerous if caught at the airport, 3 I just didnt want to lose that much money again. He managed to deliver it to me and now Im starting to think of using it again.. The catch is, I dont have the instructions! duh! My friend didnt know he was supposed to have an instruction leaf for it. So now its stuck here.. hmmmm.. been searching the net on how to use it but I cant find it. What to do now??

------------------------

Non BP related but might soon be BP related:

My bf made me promise to exercise again and be healthy again. How can I when we always order these Indian food????? He doesnt eat anything that is not as tasty nor spicy. He doesnt eat the food that I used to eat as described in my blogs circa 2008. He is not overweight but he is also not fit though.

So yesterday, we tried the gym after work, and boy, was I out of shape!! I did my usual stretching and my body ached just from stretching!!!! Went to use the treadmill to walk, brisk walk, run for 2 mins, walk with the incline starting at incline 2, increasing up to 10 (and then back down) every 2 minutes at the speed of 5.5. I set the time for 45 minutes and was able to do 30mins only. I did a few weights for my arms and the leg press. No sit ups yet, no hiphop abs yet, but I will get back to it.

I just dont know how can I get back to my old eating habits again now that Im so used to eating the way that he does.. I want to shop for the healthy food but I know he wont eat them and will buy his own food that we end up spending twice for food, instead of sharing them. Btw, Indian food portions are enough for 2 most of the time (and sooo damn tasty!).

I want to work out in the morning again. It feels good. And in the evening do the sauna thing.

Lets see. We are planning to go to the gym again later.. slowly.. I will build my strength for exercising again!! And I will be quoting Shaun T again sometime soon!!! :D

(hopefully I get to use my BPs too :((( )

Doooodeeeedooodeeeedooo beeedooobeeedooo...

BP: Last set Day 3 (?)

Hmmm...nothing new to report except that I didnt get the palpitations when 3 days after getting better from the flu.

But, my eating habits are way off.. I am now scared to get off the BPs..

I hope I can normalize that again in the coming days..

:-?

BP: Third Set

RUNDOWN:

Weight loss

All over!!! literally!! Im 3 sizes down, no exercise at all! Just lesser food intake, but no starving or deprivation..I dont want that!!

Side effects (FOR ME OK?)

For the first 2 weeks: a little palpitation, difficulty sleeping, hmmmm...wat else.? After that 2 wks, nothing.. oh! bad breath?? ewwww... well since I dont eat so much maybe? So I make sure to brush my teeth, gargle and drink fruit juices and lots of water..

Advises

DO NOT TAKE BP when you just got back from fever/flu or any sickness. In my case I had a terrible palpitation session, I felt like my eyes are going to pop out of their sockets..It lasted two hours!! Breathing hard while working..

DO COUNT THE HOURS until the orange pill take effect on you. You dont want unecessary/embarrassing trips to the bathroom..

ITS OK if you missed a pill in the set BUT MAKE SURE IT DOES NOT HAPPEN TOO OFTEN! or else the effects might be different.

ITS OK TO TAKE medicines but GIVE IT a 2 HR GAP (as per my reseller)-- so far I have taken a pain reliever, asthma meds, paracetamol, and an antibiotic (when I had a sore throat).

PLEASE EAT!! dont let the curbed appetite stop u from eating even a little. ITS NOT GOOD TO SKIP MEALS! it will destroy your metabolism (so Ive heard) so try to eat a pieace of fruit even if you are not hungry.

MIND SET. As for what Ive heard, taking the BP might cause you to feel some depression or anxiety or sadness. And I think I felt it sometimes. So try mind setting. Focus your mind into the good things.

What else? hmmm..

On to my 3rd set now.. I want to get down to size 6!!! phew!!

mwah!

You give me feeevahhh...

Err right... hahah was thinking of Beyonce singing this one...

I had fever for the past 3 days, and these damn medicines dont work (in this country!!!) and I want my biogesic and bioflu (ooops dropped a brand there didnt i?). On the 1st day of my fever chuchu i didnt take the BPs. yesterday I was feeling quite fine but still with a slight fever, I took the BPs and went to work..

WRONG IDEA!!

by lunch time I was palpitating so much that I couldnt breathe.. after 2 hrs...it went down and i was fine again...

took the green pills and the evening set 2 hrs after.

Then today, I still have fever and didnt take the BPs. I hope tomorrow I'll be fine.. I cant miss work and my language classes.. But I will not take the BPs yet tomorrow, maybe after I have fully recovered.

ADVISE: DONT TAKE BP AFTER A FLU OR FEVER. U might get some heavy palpitations if you havent fully recovered yet..I'll write about it again once I start my 3rd set maybe in 2 days.

I should have fully recovered by then...

Still slimmer though and Im lovin it!! hahahaha.. i just have to find some way to make these damn arms thinner!!! I mean, it had gotten thinner but still.. I want it a little more thinner than the rest of me..... if only i could afford the smart lipo :((

hayyy..life..aint it a bitch??? cant have it all now can i??? phewft!!!